supportvictims.org Blog

Just some of the 275 luminaries, each symbolizing a life lost to violence in 2009. CVAC and its partner organizations put on a luminary vigil in honor of National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims on September 25, 2010.

Perhaps it’s trite. When someone is murdered, we hold a vigil. When 275 people die in one year due to violence, we hold an even bigger vigil. But why? A comment in response to the Day of Remembrance vigil on KTVI’s website from “Karen A” in Florissant begins with “Hear (sic) we go again. Another rally, another march…” This sentiment is not lost amidst service providers who struggle each year to find ways to represent the victims they serve and bemoan the lack of new ideas. This year’s theme for National Day of Remembrance- Remember, Remind, Respect- points to the reason a vigil like this was so important.

Vigils have always been an obvious place for family and friends to remember their murdered loved one. At the vigil on Saturday, families held pictures, posters, and signs with victims’ faces and names. The public nature of the vigil also lends itself well to reminding America about the toll that violent crime has taken on its citizens. The 275 flickering luminary candles served as a visual reminder of that loss.

The third “R”, however, is where we seem to still have the furthest to go. Our vigil and the theme for this year’s National Day of Remembrance called for respect for victims and for their families. This call and the coverage of the event was met at best with apathy and at worst with outright disrespect. “Karen A’s” comment continued with a discussion of what she sees as the problem leading to crime, parents “who CHOOSE to bring children into a world when you have NOTHING to offer but unsafe parks, charity addiction, crappy schools and gang ridden streets.” Other commenters also make broad claims about how society has contributed to the problem and that “ we will see another generation of violent individuals that have no respect for themselves, authority, or others” (“Jimbo,” St. Charles, MO) unless the welfare system is changed. An “Unknown” poster from Belleville points to one particular location, “can you say North St. Louis,” regardless of the fact that the vigil covered 5 counties. Another poster, Blanc from St. Louis, used an abbreviation to creep his/her opinion past the censors when he/she wrote, “A testament to TNB.” The second item found in a quick Google search for that term is Urban Dictionary which lists TNB as an acronym for “Typical (Racial Epithet) Behavior.”

These wholesale indictments and generalizations of victims and their families are as hurtful as they are disrespectful. It further goes to show that none of the posters were there to see the broad range of ages, races, and backgrounds of the attendees. Perhaps it’s the anonymity that the internet provides leading to false bravado or perhaps the posters would just as readily say those things to a victims’ family. Either way, it seems that respect is the hardest of this year’s 3 R’s to come by and it shows that there still is a place for vigils for homicide victims.

Many victims are catipulted by the media to celebrity status.  Journalists and reporters fully invade their privacy:  following them, harassing family members, showing their homes and worksites on television and internet.  I realize that some victimizations, by rarity or special circumstance, require sharing a higher level of detail. But a majority of victims find themselves in a sort of celebrity status that is often unnecessary and uncalled for (and only sensationally feeds the voyarism of the public without newsworthy purpose).  

Celebrities choose to be celebrities…victims do not.   Celebrities understand that the career and lifestyle they have chosen means sharing intimate details with the public.  Victims should be allowed the same choice.

A June 20th St. Louis Post-Dispatch article named – and showed - a domestic violence victim’s home and address.  I find this incredibly irresponsible, not to mention unnecessary to the informational value of the story.  I ask reporters to remember that victims and their families deserve anonymity and privacy during their healing process unless they choose otherwise.  I ask the public to demand this respect from their news outlets.  Victims have few other choices in having been victimized…please be socially responsible and afford victims the choice of privacy.

Julie Lawson,
Executive Director

Last week the St. Louis community learned of the tragic death of “Good Samaritan” Roger Kruetz, the man who tried to stop theives from stealing a tip jar from a local Starbucks.  There have been many blogs and discussions about this incident, including asking, “would you have tried to stop him?”  Many people say they would, and they still would even knowing what happened to him.

Thousands of people every day come to the aid of victims or injustice.  It may be by physically helping citizens out of danger, reporting crime, helping maintain Neighborhood Watch programs, as law enforcement professionals, working in local community centers reaching out to victims, etc.  It is the everyday heros, like Roger, that inspire us the most.  People who are simply and completely dedicated to doing the right thing. 

In a national community where “no snitching” is the rule, Roger is a beautiful exception.  His death reminds us of how desperately little gain people will commit horrific crimes for (he was run over in an escape attempt – to escape with little more than $5).  But his death also reminds us of what we all hope for:  friends, neighbors, citizens who want to do (and will do) the right thing.  All of us want a Roger by our side.

My hope – my prayer – is that the community does not forget his sacrifice.  He lost his life for justice – to remind each of us that there is something we can all do, however small, to help others and uphold the values of our community.  Roger set a shining example of a caring, dedicated citizen.  I can only hope I will live up to such an example.

Julie Lawson, Executive Director

It is unfortunate that even more has to be done to protect children against unlawful predators and that registered ex-offenders who are successfully following the conditions of their release are now further punished.  That said, it is encouraging to see a City Council act so swiftly to protect their citizens as did the Florissant, MO council this past week by banning registered sex offenders from area parks and community centers (following an incident in which a registered sex offender exposed himself to a group of children at a local civic center). 

This action is similar to that of area councils and local governments who have also taken quick action to declare cyber-bullying a punishable crime following the death of 13-year-old St. Charles, MO resident Megan Meier. Whether or not you agree with the details of these laws, it is important that citizens know their local governments are working for them.  This type of quick and citizen-driven response to victims is the heart of what CVAC works for, and the projection of victims’ voices by these local governments is commendable. 

Welcome to CVAC’s blog.  This blog is dedicated to discussion of all topics that affect crime victims, including the community as a victim.  If you need more information or immediate assistance, please call us 24-hours a day at (314) 652-3623.